2014, & I spent the first few moments of it in a twist (literally, playing Twister) with the DreamWerkz family.
As always, the first days of my years has always been tinted with drama. Last year, I shattered my iPhone 15 minutes into 2013 (explanation for a lousy year perhaps?). This year's was just...crazy to say the least. Getting morbidly angry, then high as fuck from alcohol before crying myself to sleep at 7 in the morning thinking of all the could-have-beens. Waking up, only to be exposed & having to pretend that everything's okay. Who ever knew that coming clean is the best remedy in the end, but only at the expense of someone else you love. To feel better, whilst ruining someone's perfect fairy tale. That's Day 1 for me, and it was too much for me to take.
Now with the New Year, I just want to embark on an exciting YOLO final year as a student and fuck all the rights and do all the wrongs. Studies? What studies?
Not like I've not dedicated my entire 2013 to dancing, this year I wanna do the same but achieve different things.
1. Get into SDD Finals with NastyMeisterZ (oh god what a name now it just sounds like a joke :'D) - it's all or nothing now, a classic go hard or go home story. I just need a breakthrough, and this is it.
2. Join O School recital - I've missed this for 2 years now cuz I thought I was never good enough but now I think... I can.
3. Choreograph? Lost count of the number of people who believes I can do it more than I do so myself. Maybe I will maybe I won't. We'll know, when the time comes.
No one ever understands a dancer. To love something so much, you are willing to give up many things along the way - money, spending time with your loved ones and everything you deem important, just for a minute on stage when all eye's on you & the cheers just keep coming.
22 this year and I've never really broken free from the clutches of my parents. This year I wanna just keep exploring & leave my life behind. Starting with the many overseas trips I've gotten down to planning so far.
1. 2D1N Batam getaway
2. 2D1N Kukup trip
3. Boracay
4. 8 Day Gold Coast/London annual family trip
5. Graduation trip!
It's only 6 days into the year and it seems a lil crazy to have confirmed so many trips at one go. But I'm sure along the way, people get indecisive and so plans get cancelled.
Really hitting the "restart" button on my life. Now that I'm almost single and almost losing it, might as well go all out. My life's still in a mess while you continue living a lie. A love lost is a love lost. If you lost your man, you've lost your man. I can't put it in any better or simpler way. A heart can't be at 2 places at once.
Sometimes I wish 2014 would be the last year for me. I don't need to know what the future entails.
No comments:
Post a Comment